Ancient Police Report

This strikes me as funny.  At least it provides a revealing look into ancient life.  It was written on papyrus in AD 28 in Egypt.

To Serapion, chief of police, from Orsenouphis son of Harpaesis, notable of the village of Euhemeria, in the division of Themistes.  In the month Mesore of the past 14th year of Tiberius Caesar Augustus I was having some old walls on my premises demolished by the mason Petesouchus son of Petesouchus, and while I was absent from home to gain my living Petesouchus in the process of demolition discovered a hoard which had been secreted by my mother in a little box as long ago as the 16th year of Caesar, consisting of a pair of gold earrings weighing 4 quarters, a gold crescent weighing 3 quarters, a pair of silver armlets of the weight of 12 drachmae of uncoined metal, a necklace with silver ornaments worth 80 drachmae, and 60 silver drachmae.  Diverting the attention of his assistants and my people he had them conveyed to his own home by his maiden daughter, and after emptying out the aforesaid objects he threw away the box empty in my house, and he even admitted finding the box, though he pretends that it was empty.  Wherefore I request, if you approve, that the accused be brought before you for the consequent punishment.  Farewell.

Orsenouphis, aged fifty, scar on left forearm.

Just a few comments:

• Luke 3:1 reads, “In the fifteenth year of the reign of Tiberius Caesar…”
• He notes the month.  I’ve been struck in reading through other correspondence that they often give specific dates, whereas we wouldn’t necessarily do that today.  Nor do the writers of New Testament epistles.
• I wonder how he knew the exact contents of the box.  The box of course was forgotten, yet he knew exactly what was in it.  Did his mom tell him?  Or did he plant an empty box so that he could accuse the contractor?
• How did he know that the contractor “diverted the attention of his assistants”? 
• If you were the judge, how would you rule?
• How would you sign your name?