The semester is over in a few hours when the students get on a plane for America. That means it’s somewhat of an emotional and sentimental time here. I will try to resist. This semester was characterized by questions. Sometimes there were more than 30 questions in a two-hour lecture, and if you know me, my lecture style doesn’t exactly invite them. (For those who don’t know, my style is: I know a ton of facts and I’m going to give them to you so shut up and write everything down. With lots of pictures thrown in :-)). Besides lecture times, there were many, many other times of questions, including “Tuesdays at Todd’s,” which was essentially a question time.
But looking back over it all, I’m still surprised at the questions that weren’t asked. This is always true, but it strikes me now because of the many questions that were asked. Some of that is owing to a lack of time, some to a lack of courage, and some to not wanting to hear the answer. On the last, I see semester after semester how those who don’t really need feedback on their lives come and ask for it; those who do don’t. It’s something too that in ten years of working with college students I’ve never done pre-marital counseling, yet I know that I’ve known many couples better than anyone else. I understand why this is, but I note that they rarely come and ask even for simple feedback (like, hey, you’ve observed the two of us for the last three months; do you see any big red flags? :-)). It could be thought that students don’t trust me, but I’m not sure that that is the reason. In many ways, life at IBEX is an ideal mentoring and discipleship time. One of the main reasons this is so is because so much of life is spent together, so there is much time for “observation.” I don’t know too many pastors in America who get to see their people (pre-marital or otherwise) on a daily basis and in a variety of situations. In any case, I think I would just suggest that any of my readers, especially the younger set, look for opportunities when they can get feedback from an older person on observations on their life. The more they see you live (and not just hear you talk), the better.