Change of Program

By | April 1, 2009

After a period of serious reflection, consultation, and consideration, I have decided to make a slight change in my educational program.  The PhD at DTS is quite good, but it is also quite hard, and it takes a long time.  There’s something to be said for hard things, but there’s also something to be said for easy things.  Just because it is hard doesn’t mean that it is good.  I have had hard teachers that I have liked, and I’ve had easy teachers (not at DTS) that I’ve liked.  I’ve been in this program now for 1.3 years and am looking at another 3.2 years, plus whatever delays they decide to supplement the program with.  I love learning the Bible, but education isn’t just about learning.  At some point you just have to stop learning and get the degree.  I’ve come to realize that the degree is really the most important thing.  Students ask if you have the degree, but they never ask how long it took you to get it or what kind of degree it is.

My new program has many advantages.  First, I don’t have to move, but I can finish the degree process from my home.  Second, while it does cost, this degree is much more affordable than $500/unit.  Third, this program takes into account not only my previous education, but my work experience, life experience, job experience, and unemployment experience.  They rightly recognize the value of living.  Fourth, there are fewer requirements.  For example, I do not have to attend the graduation ceremony, but they will mail the degree to me directly. 

My degree will not be a PhD, but it will have “doctor” on the diploma, which is really all that matters.  I will be “Dr. Todd Bolen.”  Yes, once the certificate arrives, I will insist that I be called “Dr. Bolen” by my kids, wife, and anyone else who is around me.

It is true that this new direction is perceived in a negative way by TMC, and as difficult as that loss is, it is more than made up for by my job offer to be Associate Professor of Biblical Profundities at the College of the Mountain Men, located in a state west of Virginia.  The kids are celebrating because 1) they are happy that my days of learning are over and 2) they have never been to where we ‘re going.  Kelli keeps muttering something about “richer or poorer.”  I am most pleased because on the mail order form, I am allowed 15 words to describe myself. 

There can be no doubt that in years to come we will look back with awe and wonder in recalling this momentous decision, made on this day, the first of April, in the year of our Lord 2009.

13 thoughts on “Change of Program

  1. Craig Dunning

    “I am most pleased because on the mail order form, I am allowed 15 words to describe myself.”

    What were those 15 words?

    Reply
  2. Debbie

    Todd,
    I’m hoping this is an April Fool’s Joke. If so, you really had me for a few minutes. If not, I will truly miss having you on campus.

    Reply
  3. Seth Rodriquez

    Todd,

    Which notable institution are you getting your degree from? And where can I get mine? Do they take credit card? Just tell me where to send the money.

    Also, are there any other openings at the College of the Mountain Men? I can grow a good beard, you know. And I love wearing flannel. And I won’t mind eating squirrels and rabbits roasted over a campfire. Anything is better than my current predicament.

    Suffering through my 11th year of seminary and just looking for the way out,
    Seth

    Reply
  4. Justin W.

    I had to read the whole thing (with quite a bit of confusion) and come to the end where I saw it was posted on April 1st to recognize the humor.

    Good one.

    Reply
  5. Todd Bolen

    These things always backfire. I think that it’s a dead give-away that this is a joke because it says I’m quitting because it’s hard, I’m really going to stop learning, I only care about the degree, I’m really going to use the title, and I would lightly give up teaching for The Master’s College. But instead, everyone thinks those things are true about me. Sigh.

    Reply
  6. Gunner

    Come on, Todd. We all know it’s always and only been about the degrees. That’s what we all respect you so much for — your pragmatism.

    I knew it was a joke the whole time, but was a bit saddened by how many of the things you said are the types of things I consistently hear students say honestly about their education. Path of least resistance, just get the grade/degree, don’t take that hard class, that prof’s so demanding, why all these requirements, can you believe he requires that big paper, etc.

    Keep calling us to something better!

    Reply
  7. Ilena

    Man, I always fall for your April Fool’s jokes! At least, I fell for this one until I read the line:
    “Yes, once the certificate arrives, I will insist that I be called “Dr. Bolen” by my kids, wife, and anyone else who is around me.”
    I knew that wasn’t true! And, I was kind of skeptical when it came to your lame excuses about hard classes, etc.
    I laughed heartily at “Associate Professor of Biblical Profundities at the College of the Mountain Men.” But, what I really want to know is, will you make all of your students listen to COUNTRY/BLUEGRASS/GOSPEL music? ;)
    (*Sigh* There is still a disconnect in my mind between Todd Bolen and Country Music!)

    Reply
  8. Todd Bolen

    Ilena – thanks for the comment. With regard to your last question, the answer is no. I changed my practice in later years. I’ll still play songs, but I’m more limited in what I choose.

    Reply
  9. Sam Neylan

    yeah…i thought I had entered the twilight zone when I was reading about ‘just get the degree’ … and I echo Gunner’s comments (as always). :)

    I will refer to you as Dr. Bolen no matter what.

    thank you Dr. Bolen. Much obliged, Dr. Bolen. Have a great Easter, Dr. Bolen.

    Reply

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